Celebrating Women for the Real World



Good Morning

Before I start, can I just say – ONE MORE FRIGGIN DAY UNTIL I AM ON AN AIRPLANE!  Just me and my hubs.  Listen for the sweet sound of “Bow chica bow bow!”  Don’t hate.

In other news, I have a few open letters and a Me Me that I stole, er, borrowed.

First-open letters:

Dear Aunt Flo:

It’s not that I don’t like you, cause really, there have been a few times that I did hand stands when you came to visit, but now?  Not so much.  You teased me and teased me.  You are late.  Now you don’t fit into my schedule.  Just sayin.

Love, me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Asshat it the green Toyota:

Why?  Why is it that today, the day I decide not to let anyone bother me, why did you pick today to run me off the road.  You’re an asshat.  I was not thinking happy thoughts about you.  I did refrain from turning my brights on your ugly ass, but I didn’t.  I’m nice like that.

Signed – No Mo Road Rage

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Body:

When I sit on the couch and put my feet up in order to watch one of my shows, don’t, I repeat DON’T fall asleep.  I can’t like it when you fall asleep at 8:00.  See, I then have to wake up at 10:30 to go upstairs and wash my face.  Suddenly, I’m wide awake.  I toss and turn and think about the gazillion things I have to do before I leave.  I think about what I’m going to pack and then I change my mind – continually!  When you decide to finally fall asleep, it seems the alarm thinks it should go off.  I can’t like that.  So, tonight, should I happen to sit down, please don’t fall asleep.  K?  Loveyou meanit!

Love, Me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now for the Me Me.  I hate doing these things but I really wanted to know what my Gangsta and Stripper name would be.  Here ya go!

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet, current car) Patty Sebring

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (favorite ice cream, favorite cookie) Peanut Butter Chocolate Chunk (Hmm, fitting)

3. YOUR FLY “GUY/GIRL” NAME:(first initial first name, first 3 letters last name) S-Ken

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME:(favorite color, favorite animal) Pink Dog

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME:(middle name, city where you were born) Anne Harrisburg

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters last name, first 2 letters first name) KenSh

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink and add” the”) The Green Coke Zero

8. NASCAR NAME:(first names of your grandfathers) Herman Clarance

9. STRIPPER NAME:(favorite perfume, favorite candy) Very Sexy Caramel

10. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s and father’s middle names) Marie Clarence

There you go!  More than you ever needed to know.  Have a great day!

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Comments

  1. * Tammy says:

    Very Sexy Caramel? Nice.

    Aunt Flo is a Whore. WHORE I tell you!

    You should have gone ahead and road raged the rude ass.

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 9 months ago
  2. * Karen says:

    Have a great trip, not that you need me to say that! Safe travels to you and the hubs.

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 9 months ago
  3. * speck says:

    have fun.
    I have banished Aunt Flo from my house…..good riddance.
    And I love the meme….I’m stealing.

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 9 months ago
  4. * Katie says:

    Have a great time!

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 9 months ago
  5. * Carrie says:

    Bad Aunt Flo! Bad!!

    Oh, I hear ya on the waking up and not going back to sleep until the alarm goes off. Sucktastic.

    Have a great trip! I was only off by 2 weeks about you and sis going at the same time… 😛

    Love your names!

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 9 months ago
  6. * Kate says:

    aunt flo sucks but let me tell you every month she comes to visit I thank my lucky stars!

    just saying!

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 9 months ago
  7. * Patti_Cake says:

    Ooh I hope Aunt Flo doesn’t ruin your trip. That really sucks!

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 9 months ago


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