Celebrating Women for the Real World



Waste of Space Monday

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Welcome to “Waste of Space Monday” brought to us by the newly discovered Song Bird Tammy.  So for today’s entry I submit a letter from an Iowa resident to his Senator.  The WOSM is not the resident and not the letter; but the actual laws that Mr. Ruppert is writing about.  See what you think, as this sounds like a great deal to me:

Becoming Illegal

(Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator)           

The Honorable Tom Harkin
731 Hart Senate Office Building
Phone (202) 224 3254
Washington DC,
20510

 
Dear Senator Harkin,
 
     As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal  Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.
 
     My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen  to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this  bill’s provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the 
United States for five years, all I need to do to become a  citizen
is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last  five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.
      Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I’m excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of  taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way  that I can  apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.
 
     Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying  premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.
 
     Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would  receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as “in-state” tuition rates for many colleges  throughout the United States for my son.
     Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of  renewing my driver’s license and making those  burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car.
 
     If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal  (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative.Thank you for your assistance.
 
             Your Loyal Constituent,
             Donald Ruppert
 
 
            

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Comments

  1. * kate says:

    that letter is sad but hysterical!
    OH my!

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  2. * meritt says:

    I held my breath a little when I read it was from an Iowan… but whether it’s true or not, it’s a sad commentary on our country isn’t it?

    I wonder… if I moved to England next week – would England bend over backwards to give me everything we give illegal aliens here in America?

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  3. * Katie says:

    Things like this make my blood boil.

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  4. * Katy says:

    So, I would really like one of those applications as well. I will have three children toput through college in a few years and if I could get some sort of assistance with that. I also would like to get government assistance in the form of foodstamps because these two boys will be eating me out of house and home very soon.
    Oh and by the way, missed you guys!!!!

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  5. I think it’s sad but I hope this really, really was sent.

    This is a great way to drive a point across.

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  6. * Lori says:

    I saw this awhile back and the whole thing just pisses me off. Not right.

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  7. * Tammy says:

    Donald is my hero.

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  8. * Karen says:

    I think we all have the same opinion here. Especially here in Houston, jeez. It’s enough to make a person swear.

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  9. * Nocturnal says:

    That did indeed drive the point home and it’s indicative of that which has been wrong for a very long time. Alas, the timing of the “immigration debate” is nothing more than a ploy by our dumb backwards ass country fuck of a president to divert attention from his failures to something he can “potentially” gain popularity from imho.

    In other words, yes the matter pointed out in this post is a problem; but not the *real* problem these days.

    Two cents.

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  10. * Cheeky says:

    I agree with Tammy – my new hero

    | Reply Posted 10 years, 1 month ago
  11. Follow these guidelines and you will build that new home with little, or no, problems. bathroom tile can help…

    | Reply Posted 9 years, 7 months ago


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