Celebrating Women for the Real World

Thoughts on Motherhood

Maybe I should entitle this “If I Knew Then What I Know Now”. Don’t worry, this is not going to be a complaint about motherhood. I was stuck in traffic. Not that uncommon when you live in Houston. I saw a pregnant teenager. She must have been about 15. She was walking hand in hand with who I guess was the baby’s father. They couldn’t have been more happy about their situation. This made me wonder. Though they may be able to care for a baby and tend to that child’s needs, how are they going to handle the struggles that come along as that child grows, matures, and has other needs?

I’m sure I’m not the only woman who, during the birthing process, declared that this child would be the only child and castration of the father was definitely a thought. Yeah, I din’t think so. Three children later…… You see, I believe that God gave us the ability to forget the birthing experience and enjoy the miracle.

After the birthing experience, you have the colic, the sleepless nights, the terrible two’s, three’s, etc. You think while your experiencing this stage “will I ever make it through?” Now that I’m the parent of teenagers, I can assure you that, not only will you make it through, you will miss it! Yes, you heard me, you will miss it. You will laugh at those humdinger tantrums, the up all nights, the lack of “mommy time”.

So now I wonder, in a few years, will I be looking back at the “teenager stage” and laughing at some of the struggles we’re having? I think my biggest stress with having teenagers is knowing what I did when I was a teenager. If my kids even try half that stuff…..I just don’t want to go there. It’s very hard for a parent to let go and let their teenager make choices and decisions on their own when you know that there is a better choice or decision. I often wonder if, when my children are older and perhaps parents themselves, will they look back and have fond memories of their teenage years? Will I look back with fond memories forgetting the yucky part of teenager rearing just like I did with childbirth? I mean, there aren’t too many days that go by that I don’t hear what a mean, terrible, unfair parent I am. There aren’t too many instances that I hear “I love you, mom”, or “you’re a great mom”, or “you are right mom, I think I’ll listen to your advice.”

What is the point of this post? Maybe to encourage the new mother, or the mother of toddlers that yes, it will get better. Maybe I’m licking my own wounds. Like I said, it’s been a while since my kids have looked at me and said “I love you mom. You’re doing a great job!”

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  1. * BlondGirl says:

    Yes, there will come a time that you look back at the teenager stage and laugh at the struggles you are having. My youngest is 23 and, more than anything, I wish I could go back to the days that he was a teenager and, knowing what I know now, deal with him differently.

    We have had a real struggle with this one (I thought #1 son was a tough cookie) and I hope and pray that he doesn’t kill himself or someone else with his screwing around.

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 2 months ago
  2. * Mama Duck says:

    Great. That’s good. Can I send my two year old to you for a few years?

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 2 months ago
  3. * aka_Meritt - www.coffeetalking.blogspot.com says:

    Point of this post?

    What? Is that a new rule? Our posts HAVE to have points? LOL. I’m in trouble then as I luv to ramble with no reason at all. 😉

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 2 months ago
  4. * Suz says:

    I enjoyed your post maybe because Iam going thru the same with my teens though I do have to say having also a 4 year old sometimes I dont see any difference between them except for their age.

    I do know time flies by so fast and we all need to treasure every moment.

    Hugs Suz

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 2 months ago
  5. * Anonymous Shannon says:

    I’m glad God helped you to forget the birhting experience. He burned the experience in my brain so that I would never forget! However, I have a beautiful daughter who is the light of my life, and who could want more than that!

    P.S. Mama Duck, just wait until your little one turns three! Just Kidding! it’s not that bad! 🙂

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 2 months ago
  6. * MilkMaid says:

    They do come back, well, at least I came back to my Dad LOL! My oldest is 25 and my baby is 15. When my oldest finished high school, he was done, all grown up and ready to move out. And move out on his own he did. And except for one very short period, he’s stayed on his own. At first, it was kinda hard for me to totally let go, cuz there was nothing I could do, he WAS grown. But after a while, I was able to relax and enjoy this new person in my life. I still look at his tiny blonde blonde face with those big baby blue eyes in pictures and miss that person, but this new one is fun too.

    Don’t get me started on my Little Kid, LOL!

    You have a great blog here!! I think I asked but now can’t find the post or comment, the brown wall next to the fireplace, what kind of wall treatment is that?? It looks so warm and yummy in the picture….carol

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 2 months ago

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