Celebrating Women for the Real World

Easy Tips For Eating Healthy During The Holidays

I’ve read so many articles lately regarding how to eat healthy and not gain weight during the holidays. This was my favorite and most practical.

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they’re serving rum balls.
2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it’s rare. In fact, it’s even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can’t find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It’s not as if you’re going to turn into an eggnog-aholic or something. It’s a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It’s later than you think. It’s Christmas!
3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That’s the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.
4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they’re made with skim milk or whole milk. If it’s skim, pass. Why bother? It’s like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.
5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people’s food for free. Lots of it. Hello?
6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year’s. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you’ll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.
7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don’t budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They’re like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you’re never going to see them again.
8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don’t like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?
9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it’s loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.
10. One final tip: If you don’t feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven’t been paying attention.
11. Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.


Trackbacks & Pingbacks


  1. * SuZan says:

    hmmmmmm, I’ll whip up some rumballs when you and jk come over for dinner! 🙂

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 7 months ago
  2. * Carrie says:

    Oh, that is just too funny! Thaks for the giggle!

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 7 months ago
  3. * Suz says:

    LOL … I enjoyed that.

    Hugs Suz

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 7 months ago
  4. * Anonymous Shannon says:

    Yes! I love this diet! I’m going to start dieting tomorrow!

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 7 months ago
  5. * Gabreael says:

    Hey, I am a custard gal. Nogg is too tart.




    | Reply Posted 12 years, 7 months ago
  6. * Last Girl On Earth says:

    That is about the funniest thing I’ve read all day! Personally, I LOVE pumpkin pie and eggnog. I waiting to get invited to a party where someone will serve it! My friends are all on health kicks. You know… they go for the carrot sticks! I guess I’ll have to send them over here to read the NEW RULES!

    Last Girl On Earth

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 7 months ago
  7. * Christie says:

    my family has broken all those rules at least once.

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 7 months ago
  8. * CrazyRideLady says:

    Got this from a friend the other day, LOVE IT! Words to live by!

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 7 months ago
  9. * Spikey1 says:

    Very good! LOL

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 7 months ago

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