Celebrating Women for the Real World

Families & Holidays

Well, we made it through Thanksgiving. Now it’s time to make plans for Christmas. Always a fun and interesting holiday around our house what with blended families, extended families, etc. My single, childless, vegetarian, OLDER sister (had to add that), from New York comes and stays with us every year. The kids love her visits because, well, she’s a big kid. She and I couldn’t be any different if we tried. That’s fine as this makes our visits very interesting. This year she asked if her “boyfriend”, should he be able to come (um, maybe not a good word choice), could stay with us as well.

I had a hesitation because, well, I didn’t even know there WAS a boyfriend let alone have time to absorb the fact that he would want to come for a visit. Oh, there’s more. She’s actually only been with him a few times as he lives in a different state. They met over the internet!

This may sound bad, but I’m not worried about her. She’s an adult. After all, I’ve met my share of men in, shall we say-questionable establishments (a long time ago honey). But when she asked if he could stay with us, I just didn’t feel comfortable with that. I mean, she really doesn’t KNOW this person. I have children-A TEENAGE DAUGHTER in particular that I’m responsible for.

What do you all think? Did I make the right decision?

BTW-he wasn’t able to make the trip so I am off the hook. But, if he would have been able to join her, ??????


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  1. * aka_Meritt - www.coffeetalking.blogspot.com says:


    He is, for all purposes, a stranger. She knows little about the real him… and you know nothing.

    STAYING IN YOUR HOME? Umm I think not. I WOULD however invite them over and then make sure she had the number of the nearest nice hotel.

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  2. * Tammy says:

    Um, no. If he would be able to make it, send him to Motel 6.

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  3. * SuZan says:

    Absolutely no way! Not only because of your daughter but all five of you.

    You have too many worries in your life right now to add if ya’ll are going to be harmed in your sleep or something. I know that this is a gloom & doom attitute but I just don’t think the risk is worth it.

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  4. * Kelly says:

    That is tough. However, I would trust your sister’s choices and judgment (for lack of better words) and assume this man is perfectly nice, noraml and not an ax murder sicko. Then again, if it involved them sharing a bed toghether, I might take pause as not wanting to approve that in front of your teenage daughter.

    Just my 2 cents!

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  5. * Karen says:

    I don’t know, he’d be a stranger but your daughter thinks enough of him to invite him for Christmas. Hmmm. I don’t think I’d have them stay together at my house because of the younger kids. I’d get him a nice hotel room nearby.

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  6. * Suz says:

    If she has only seen him a few times then defintely not. You are right, you do have the responsibility of your family to considerate.

    If he would of made the trip, a nice hotel would be just fine. This would of given you the oppotunity to meet him before bringing him into your home.

    Hugs Suz

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  7. * Christie says:

    I think you made the right choice 🙂

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  8. * Chickadee says:

    Absolutely..you made the right choice. Too often you hear about children getting molested and/or kidnapped in these type of circumstances and there was a degree of surprise on the parent’s behalf about the person that did it.

    Of course no one is accusing your sister’s boyfriend of being a sexual predator, but why take chances? I would hope that your sister would understand.

    But you don’t have to worry about it anyways. But it still may be a good opportunity for discussion with your sister.

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  9. * Renee says:

    This situation has icky all over it. You made the right choice and I think that his not being able to make it was his way of saying I Don’t think so! Most honorable men will find a way out of such situations…so maybe this guy isn’t all that bad.


    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  10. * Holly says:

    i think you did the right thing. after all, what if the guy was really a creep and put some move on your daughter while everyone else was drinking eggnog?

    no one will be staying at our house in the same bed unless they are 1) the same sex, or 2) married

    it was the same rule at my parent’s house when i was living there after my divorce before i met my husband

    | Reply Posted 12 years, 3 months ago
  11. * Erik Mann says:

    great topic, keep up the great posts, MMA

    | Reply Posted 11 years, 7 months ago

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